A feeling I have never felt before...

It has been a day since Prague, and some time since the incident of which I am writing about here.

Since that time I've attempted to put what i've been feeling into words. At poetry I've failed miserably, but perhaps a short essay, and a song from The Beatles, will clarify things.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbKGsEK_T9g They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, yet this is not an absence but a death.

I know, in my heart, that we shall not meet again,to grow not fonder, but instead remember what once was, and mourn the loss of what might have been. Would our affection, so readily kindled, have collapsed in on itself, in its own heat? Would it have, perhaps, roared, and then smouldered, eventually leaving only ash; or would it have blossomed into something more long lasting?

This is, I think, what the poets call love, and the cynics call misery...

I will shoulder this burden of my heart, heavy though it may be; this love of which I speak will not be the last, though it be the first. There will be others, this I know, but I will always remember my first love, my first meaningful kiss, at the hands of a woman from Germany.